Category: Zelda

Grumpy dog and bloody floor

On By NeaIn Anxiety, Family, Mental Health, Oracle, Studying, ZeldaLeave a comment

Yesterday did not go as planed at all. My parents where suppose to have the dogs until tonight, but my mum was not feeling well. So we had the dogs home over the evening and the night. Today my parents have the dogs over the day and then after Uni today I am getting them back. My parents are helping us with the dogs a lot and I am so grateful for it. But my mind was so set on a evening alone, without no dogs and no husband. Now I got a evening with the dogs. And a very grumpy Oracle. She was so mad at me yesterday.

It all began when my mum was cutting Oracles claws and she accidentally cut too much, so there was a lot of blood. Blood on the floor, on the dog and well it felt like everywhere. I know I am exaggerating, but I have a problem with blood, I get lightheaded and I have passed out. This might sound strange, but if it is a stranger that’s bleeding I can handle it, but if it is someone I care about, I can’t. At least not if I am not alone with the one that bleeds. I know this is so weird, but it’s just how it is. I think it might have something to do with my anxiety. Like it triggers something in me. Maybe some kind of fears to lose someone I care about.

Any how, after that the bleeding would not stop, not for long at least because Oracle wanted to lick her paws clean. So it started bleeding again. So we had to put a bandage on Oracles paw and then a kind of protective sock. She hates this. It makes her grumpy and she was showing me her feelings about it the whole evening. It is hard to tell a dog that it is for her best, even though I feel like she understands most things that I tell her, I know we have different opinions about this. I hope she will be less grumpy this evening. I just want to cuddle down under a blanket on the sofa and maybe get some writing done. And I hope that the dogs want to cuddle down with me. But we will just have to see.

Today my friends and I are hoping to get our project finished so we can have a day at home on Monday to study for our exam. So please keep your fingers crossed for us. Now I really need to get to it. I will try and take time to write here soon again.

I wish you all a fantastic Friday!

Love, Nea

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Last semester

On By NeaIn About me, Anxiety, Depression, Edinburgh, Heriot-Watt University, Life, Love, Mental Health, Music, Oracle, Panic attacks, Study Abroad, Studying, University, ZeldaLeave a comment

Today my last semester at this University starts, or at least the last planed semester. I am thinking about taking one more semester at uni, maybe not this university. I am going to try and get a meeting with my student counselor and look at the course I want to take.

One of the songs that motivates me right now.

I only have afternoon lectures today, two of them. And the last one ends at six this evening, which means I won’t be home until earliest 7. It’s going to be a long day and I am kind of nervous. This might sound strange, I mean this is my uni, where I already gone for four semesters. But since I went my 5th semester abroad and now I am back here in Sweden, it feels kind of weird. I mean, I am not really the same woman that left Sweden. I feel like I have grown a lot and I know more of what I want in life.

I have always loved my uni, but I loved the Heriot-Watt University as well, and I know I will miss it. But it is really nice to do my last semester here in Sweden. I am looking forward to Autumn and yesterday morning I could almost smell the Autumn in the air. It was cold and crisp. This morning I almost wanted to go inside again because I thought it was so cold, but Zelda was happy just walking and sniffing on everything.

One of the motivating songs I listen to today.

Oracle went with my husband to work earlier this morning and I am dropping Zelda of there on the way to campus. This way I am not alone at home with my nerves, but I do not have to deal with two dogs when I am packing everything up. Plus Oracle gets some extra time alone with my husband, which she really needs.

I can feel my anxiety levels are kind of high right now and it helps me a lot that I have Zelda here at home with me. She is sitting next to me on the sofa right now and the music also helps. I am trying my best to keep myself from spiraling and keep myself grounded. I know I can do this. I also know that I have my husband just a phone call away if I need to talk, which also helps. But now I am going to get ready for my lectures today.

I wish you all an amazing Tuesday.

Love, Nea

Not my day today..

On By NeaIn About me, Everyday life, Fangirl, Life, Oracle, ZeldaLeave a comment

It feels like everything that can mess with me is messing with me today. The computer have frozen on me a couple of times today. My usb-stick has locked down, so I can’t ad or change anything on it. I don’t really know how that happened, because I used it yesterday and everything was working like normal.

It’s been raining the whole day here, and this morning I put on the dogs their raincovers, because Zelda hates walking in the rain. This morning was no exception, she walked like 20 meters and then she had done all of her business and wanted to go inside again, but Oracle loves walking and does not care about the weather, so we continued walking. When I got in about 30 minutes later my shoes was wet all the way through as well as my jacket and pants. I also had to pissed of dogs, Zelda because she had to walk in the rain and Oracle because we did not walk as long as we usually does.

This is just a small part of my day. I will not share any more, because it feels like I am only whining, and I don’t want to do that. I have to say that I now have to really cozy dogs that want to cuddle and be close. And I have actually gotten some important things done today, so the day has not been to bad.

I wish you all an amazing Friday evening, and don’t forget that Taylor Swifts new album Lover now is out! I have been listening to it all day long.

Exam, cloudy head and happy dance

On By NeaIn About me, Books, Depression, Everyday life, Family, Life, Love, Mental Health, Oracle, Panic attacks, Studying, University, ZeldaLeave a comment

Yesterday I had my Introduction to Law Exam. It was in one of the two new exam halls, that opened this summer at my university. It was really nice and I am actually looking forward to having more exams there. I am not completely sure how the exam went for me, but I did my best. And with two sick dogs for the last week (the dogs are feeling better today) and not that much time to study because of it, I have to be okay with that. If I need to take the exam again I just have to.

Zelda on this mornings walk.

My parents took care of the dogs when I took the exam, and my husband drove me. Which was nice. He is really busy right now, with the new house and work. Next week he is going to go away for work, and he will be gone almost the whole week. But it is the kind of project he loves to do, so that is nice.

Today I have a cloudy head. I don’t really know how to explain it any other way. What I mean is that it feels kind of fluffy in there. Like I’m not completely awake. I usually gets like this after an exam. I think it might have something to do with the fact that for 4 hours yesterday my brain had to work really hard and it needs a break for a while now.

Oracle chilling on the sofa.

So today my head and I have washed clothes (four full machines), done the dishes and vacuumed the house. I also had a kind of happy dance in the living room, because why not. It is important to enjoy life. Sometimes the best is to dance like nobody is watching. And if a neighbor saw, lets say I don’t care. I had a great time.

I have also started reading a new book today. Nora Roberts book The Collector. I have never read it before, but Nora Roberts is one of my favorite writers. The book is real good so far, and I have to admit I have read about halfway through so far. It is hard to put down.

My husband is going to be home late today. He is at my brother and sister-in-law and helping them. I could have gone with, but with the dogs still not all okay and my head cloudy I just don’t really think I am the best company. So instead I will cuddle down in the sofa with the dogs and continue reading.

I wish you all an amazing evening.

Love, Nea

Home in Sweden

On By NeaIn About me, Edinburgh, Family, Great Britain, Heriot-Watt University, Oracle, Study Abroad, Travle, ZeldaLeave a comment

We came home to Sweden on Monday. I can’t explain the feeling in my body when we drove over the bridge from Denmark to Sweden. It was so surreal. And then when we drove into our little town and knowing that would soon see my dogs for the first time in 5 months. I started crying of happiness.

Being home these last two days with the dogs have been amazing, even if we came home to Oracle being sick. She has probably eaten something bad outside that have made her sick.

My husband and dogs out on an evning walk yesterday.

I have spent the days with the dogs and unpacking everything… And I still have a lot to unpack. Also a whole lot of washing to do. But that’s fine. I don’t mind it. I have the best company in the dogs.

Yesterday, my parents came over to take a couple of thing they had forgotten when they moved out on Monday. And my sister-in-law and nephew came over for a visit. It was so nice. I have missed them all so much.

I will try and update more about Scotland and our trip home in a couple of days. Right now I am going to spend some time with the dogs. Have an amazing Wednesday.

Love, Nea

Missing my family..

On By NeaIn About me, Edinburgh, Life, Love, Mental Health, Oracle, picture, Study Abroad, Thankful, University, ZeldaLeave a comment

Today is a though day. I am missing my family like crazy.

I want to snuggle with my dogs and go on a long walk with them. Hear Zelda snore when she sleeps and have Oracle snuggle up in my arms. Tell them I love them and give them kisses.

I want to talk to my nephew and see him smile because we are playing with his cars. Hug him and tell him I love him. He is my little ray of sunshine.

I want to talk about photography and books with my dad and give him a hug. Tell him that I love him and how thankful I am to have him as my father.

I want to talk about the garden with my mom and hug her. Tell her I love her and how much I appreciate all the things she does for me.

My nephew and Sister-in-law.

I want to talk to my brother about his job and his son. and hug him and tell him he is the best big brother a girl can have. And that I love him.

I want to talk about baking gluten-free baking with my mother-in-law. And how grateful I am to her for raising as an amazing man as my husband. To tell her I love her and give her a hug.

I want to talk about everything with my sister-in-law. About my nephew, her new work and the plans for the house. Talk about traveling. Tell her how happy I am to have her in my life. That she and my nephew are the best things that has happen in my brothers life. And that I love her for it.

I just really miss them all. And after one week of stress to finish two essays I feel so tired and I miss them more. I know that I am almost halfway to getting home again and seeing them all. And I know that the following weeks will be packed with things to do.

I have two essays left to write. And to exams in May. And it is about two weeks until I have Spring-Break for three weeks, when I will be studying my ass of to pass my exams and finish the last essay.

My husband!

My husband is understanding and supportive and without him I would not be able to do this. He helps me through the hard days and always listens to me. I love him and I am grateful that such an amazing man loves me.

Sorry for my rant. I just needed to get this out. I wish you all an amazing Thursday!

Love, Nea

First week

On By NeaIn Anxiety, Books, Depression, Edinburgh, Fangirl, Great Britain, Heriot-Watt University, Life, Love, Mental Health, Oracle, Panic attacks, Situation Sunday, Study Abroad, Studying, University, ZeldaLeave a comment

I have now completed my first week at University in Edinburgh. And it feels kind of strange. I still miss home, but mostly my dogs. It’s hard not seeing them every day and yesterday was one of the hardest days because Oracle turned 6 years old yesterday. I hated not being there. Not taking her to her favourite pet-store where she would have picked out her favourite chews that I would have bought for her. But I know that she has had a wonderful day with my parents. And that they gave her the chews that she loves.

This week has been full of fun things to do, some a little harder than the rest. I can’t believe that we have been living here in Edinburgh for over a week. I know I have written about my first two days at University but I want to tell you about the rest of my week.

On Wednesday we got up quite early and ate breakfast. I had a headache, but when it had become light outside we walked to our nearest Tesco, about 24-30 minute walk away and did some shopping. Then we walked back to our apartment.

In the afternoon I had an International Student Welcome at Campus so I went there. It was a lot of information and I learned things that I think will be useful in the future here in Edinburgh for me.

On Thursday I had two lectures. On in the morning and then one in the afternoon. The first one in the morning was a Business Class with about 300 students in the class. We had the lecture in a really big lecture hall. The Professor was really interesting to listen to and I think I will enjoy this class a lot. Even if I think that it can be challenging at times.

Heriot Watt University

After the lecture I had four hours before my next lecture began, so I met up with my husband and had some lunch. Then we went to the pop-up bookstore that is on campus for two weeks to buy some course literature, but they didn’t have one of the books. The staff was so nice so they called their bookstore in the city centrum a have them put a copy aside for me.

With more than two hours left before my lecture, my husband and I explored the Campus area and just spent some time together. My last lecture of the day was amazing. It was interesting and fun, and I am already looking forward to the next Thursday so I can go to the lecture again.

On Friday we took the bus into Princes Street in the morning. We went shopping in Primark on Princes Street and I found some really nice things. After that, we went to Lothian Buse’s office and bought bus cards, so we no longer need to have change for every bus ride. And then we went to the bookstore and got the book that was set aside for me and some other things.

I was really tired when we got home, but after lunch, I set out to sort out the reading I had to do for my lectures and make a schedule for my classes. And then I noticed that I had missed buying one book. So we decided to go to the city centre again on Saturday.

Our new favorite walks.

On Saturday I woke up not feeling my best, I think my nerves got the best of me. So instead of hopping on a bus into the city centre, we decided to take a small walk in the area around our apartment. The small walk became a 70 minutes walk. Then when we got back to the apartment we ate some lunch and then we took a bus into the city. It was a bit cold and windy. We hopped off the bus and walked a new way to the bookstore. At the bookstore, we bought the book that was missing for my class and then we walked to Princess Street. We walked into TK Maxx, but it was so crowded so we left almost directly. Instead, we walked to Primark here I bought some things again.. I am wondering if I should make a post about what I have bought. We will see. Then we took the tram out to Gyle Shopping Center because here they have the Disney Store. As some of you might know I love Disney. We bought a blanket and a Christmas ornament and then we walked around some in the shopping centre before we did some shopping at Morrison. Then we took the next bus home and had a nice evening eating some good food, talking and finally watching the Voice UK on the telly.

Today I am going to study and get ready for the week. I wish you all a wonderful Sunday!

Emergency Room, Sick & Exam results ~ Situation Sunday

On By NeaIn A, About me, Everyday life, Life, Love, Mental Health, Oracle, Panic attacks, Situation Sunday, Studying, ZeldaLeave a comment

It’s Sunday and another week has passed. We are getting closer and closer to Christmas and I wish it would snow outside. But we are stuck with 8 degrees Celsius and cloudy weather. I have just seen the sun for a couple of hours this week.

As you know I been home sick this week. All week, so I have missed the first two lectures of my new course, but I have maxing friends that have sent me their notes. And this week last two classes were cancelled because the professor got sick. And that’s fine by me because that means I hopefully am not sick when they are rescheduled. 

If you read my post from Monday night, you know my husband had to go to the Emergency Room, but the doctors think it was just his cold and fever that was the problem. He is still not okay. And I am actually still worried about him. He hates going to the doctor, but I feel like I might have to convince him to go next week if he doesn’t get better. 

Oracle and Zelda on a walk this week

I got some amazing news on Tuesday afternoon, but I will share that with you in another post later on. Right now I just want to keep it secret for a little while longer. But it’s about the same thing that I wrote a post about for a couple of weeks ago. You can read it here.

And as you might have read on Wednesday, my husband and I had been together for 12 years that day. We did not calibrate because we both were sick so we will do that another day.

My husband and I in autumn 2007.

Friday I went to my grandmother’s house to start going through the things that we are dividing between my father, my uncle, my brother and me. My grandmother passed away in August, and my father and uncle have been going through her house for about two months now dividing things between them and now they thought it was my brother and my time to see if we wanted anything after her and my grandfather. It was really hard being there and going through her things. I miss her so much. But I am thankful for all the memories and that I get to keep some things as a memory after her. I am going back today to look at some more things and see my uncle.

And this afternoon my husband and I are eating dinner with my mother, my father, my brother, my sister-in-law and my nephew at my parent’s apartment. 

I also got the news on Friday, that I passed my Statistic Exam. I am so happy. Now I can focus fully on my Law course and place the statistic books in my bookshelf. And hopefully, I will never study Statistics again. 

This weeks posts are:

I hope everyone have an fantastic Sunday.

Love, Nea

Walks ~ Self-Care Saturday

On By NeaIn Love, Mental Health, Oracle, Self-Care Saturday, Studying, Zelda1 Comment

It’s a cloudy Saturday here in Sweden and I am still not over my cold, but it’s time for this week’s Self-Care post. 

There are so many ways to take care of yourself. And I have already cared some with you. One thing I like to do is take walks, short or long. You get out in the fresh air and you can think. Also, you get exercise which is important and good for you.

I usually walk with my dogs. And my husband is with me at least one walk a day. For me is the walking a way to relax. Not see the things that I need to do at home, or with my studying. Just to walk and think about whatever comes to my mind. Yesterday when my husband and I took the last walk of the days with the dogs, I thought about the moon. And that was relaxing for me. 

Oracle and Zelda on a walk.

Walking also gives me perspective over things. For example, when I got stuck on an assignment for school I can take a walk and relax, and I usually get a new idea when I am out in the fresh air. 

Do you take a walk every day? Have an amazing Saturday and if you can try taking a walk today. Alone or in the company with dogs, friends and/or family.

Love, Nea

Racer-Zelda and the little tree

On By NeaIn Life, Oops..., Oracle, Zelda1 Comment



I was out on the morning walk with the dogs. It´s cloudy outside and the ground is wet from the rain that came yesterday. The dogs are understimulated because my husband and I aren’t completely well yet. And they start chasing each other and playing. They still have their leases on. And you know in movies how dogs run around a person so they can’t move. They did that to me, so I almost fell, but I am getting used to it so I was trying to get loose from Oracles lease when Zelda thought it was a good idea to run around a little tree…  And can you guess what happens next? 



The tree is quite flexible and Zelda try to get free, so the tree bends when she tries running to me so I get the tree like a whip in the side of my head. It hurt. But Zelda didn’t understand why I got angry at her. She was just really proud that she got lose from the tree herself.


Now we are inside in the warmth again and the dogs seem to be pleased with their morning walk.



Later today I will post my Fangirl Friday post. Hope you read it!                    Have a wonderful Friday!



Love, Nea