Grumpy dog and bloody floor

Yesterday did not go as planed at all. My parents where suppose to have the dogs until tonight, but my mum was not feeling well. So we had the dogs home over the evening and the night. Today my parents have the dogs over the day and then after Uni today I am getting them back. My parents are helping us with the dogs a lot and I am so grateful for it. But my mind was so set on a evening alone, without no dogs and no husband. Now I got a evening with the dogs. And a very grumpy Oracle. She was so mad at me yesterday.

It all began when my mum was cutting Oracles claws and she accidentally cut too much, so there was a lot of blood. Blood on the floor, on the dog and well it felt like everywhere. I know I am exaggerating, but I have a problem with blood, I get lightheaded and I have passed out. This might sound strange, but if it is a stranger that’s bleeding I can handle it, but if it is someone I care about, I can’t. At least not if I am not alone with the one that bleeds. I know this is so weird, but it’s just how it is. I think it might have something to do with my anxiety. Like it triggers something in me. Maybe some kind of fears to lose someone I care about.

Any how, after that the bleeding would not stop, not for long at least because Oracle wanted to lick her paws clean. So it started bleeding again. So we had to put a bandage on Oracles paw and then a kind of protective sock. She hates this. It makes her grumpy and she was showing me her feelings about it the whole evening. It is hard to tell a dog that it is for her best, even though I feel like she understands most things that I tell her, I know we have different opinions about this. I hope she will be less grumpy this evening. I just want to cuddle down under a blanket on the sofa and maybe get some writing done. And I hope that the dogs want to cuddle down with me. But we will just have to see.

Today my friends and I are hoping to get our project finished so we can have a day at home on Monday to study for our exam. So please keep your fingers crossed for us. Now I really need to get to it. I will try and take time to write here soon again.

I wish you all a fantastic Friday!

Love, Nea

Thankful Tuesday – Oracle

As of last week my oldest dog, Oracle turns 6,5 years old. In many ways she is the reason that I am currently having the life I have. She is the reason I can function almost like a “normal person”. She has helped me with so many of my issues and even though I am still fighting my mental health every day, I now have something I did not have before I got Oracle. I have the courage to do something, even when its hard.

It was my therapist that said I should get a dog and to be honest it was the best advice I ever got from that therapist. I have always dreamt of a dog. Always wanted one, but I grew up being allergic and had asthma, and I still am. But I took an allergy test, because allergies change over time and it had. I was no longer allergic to dogs. I made my boyfriend take a allergy test as well, because what was the point on getting a dog if he was allergic. He is the love of my life and I did not want to make him sick, because of my dreams and hopes. But he was not allergic.

Then came the months and months I researcher dog breads to find a dog that could help me. That could be trained to be my therapy dog. I know you can by a therapy dog, but they are expensive and we did not have that kind of money. No, I needed to fin a dog bred that I could train. I researcher therapy dogs and started to think of what I needed the dog to do.
In the end I had some criteria:
– It had to be a dog that liked to work
– A happy dog bred
– A dog that could be okay with a few days of shorter walks and then walk a few miles another day
– A dog that could be in my lap.

The fact that I needed to have a dog that could be in my lap narrowed down the breeds. I had always wanted a lab or a German Shepard. But these breeds where not the right one. In the end we visited different kennels and found out that the dog for me was a Corgi. In particular a Welsh Corgi Cardigan.

And after almost 1,5 years since I started Oracle was born and my boyfriend (now husband) bought her for me. We visited the kennel three times before we brought her home with us.

Even though I did my research and know all things I thought I needed to know to have a dog, nothing could ever prepare me for the love I feel for Oracle or the bond between us. Or how she would bring so much joy and chaos to my life.

And nothing could ever prepare me for the love she has for my husband (her dad). She is the best dog I ever known and there are a lot of people who thinks she is more human than a dog. She always senses when someone is not doing alright. Then she will do everything in her power to make them feel better. I have seen it with me, my father (he has heart problems) and with a few friends that been having a rough time. She has a heart of gold and I can honestly say I don’t know where I would have been without her in my life. Probably not sitting her, planing for the last term before I take my Batchelers Degree and so happy with my life I sometimes think I will burst.

I wish you all an amazing Tuesday. I am going to spend this day at home with the dogs, studying and packing. And being grateful to having my dogs as part of my family.

Love, Nea

Hard couple of DAYS!

Tomorrow is the day that School starts here in Edinburgh for me. It’s scarry and I have wanted to go home since Thursday when we arrived. It feels like something is missing. Like something is wrong… I can’t excplain it better.

I told my husband this and we had a long chat. He was very understanding and supportive. For this I am so greatful. We talked about how I miss the dogs. What makes my anxiety are through the roof. And all my fears right now. And you know what. It feels better now. It doesen’t feel completly fine. But maybe I will get there?!

We took the decision that we are going to give it 2 weeks and then se how I feel. How my mental health is and what I feel like doing. I am not a quiter but these few days I have wanted to go home and be with my dogs. And having my family just a short drive away. Not several hours away with an ocean between.

My reading nook in the apartment

I am sharing this with you becase I want to be honest. Life isn’t always easy and sometimes it’s a real pain in my ass. Days like this I hate my anxiety and panicdisorder. I usually can hold my thoughts and feelings in check. But appearently not right now…

My husband is my greatest supporter and that he believes in me. That I can do this is so helpful. I want to make him proud of me and show everyone els that I am stronger then they think.

I hope you all have an amazing Sunday. We are going to take a quiet evening in the apartment and get ready for tomorrow.

Love, Nea

Last day at Campus

Yesterday I had my last day at campus, here in Sweden before I go to Edinburgh. It has been a hard week so far. And I am so thankful for my friends at campus for helping me through this tough week. I think that it’s more real now that we are moving. Moving away from my dogs, my family and my friends. It has always been like months away, and now its just a couple of weeks. I am looking forward to studying abroad, but I know I will miss everyone at home. 

I have always dreamed about studying in another country. But with my depression, anxiety and panic attacks I never thought I would be possible. Now, thanks to my wonderful husband’s support and the help from my family I am finally going. 

I know that I am stronger than I think. I know I can do anything I want to do and I also know that my dogs are going to be well taken care of while I am gone. And this is a quote that I try to remember.

Picture taken buy me and the quote is by: H. Jackson Brown Jr.

I missed posting a few of my planned Christmas Countdown post this week, just because I have had these bad days. But I will post them soon. 

Have an fantastic Friday!

Love, Nea

Emergency Room, Sick & Exam results ~ Situation Sunday

It’s Sunday and another week has passed. We are getting closer and closer to Christmas and I wish it would snow outside. But we are stuck with 8 degrees Celsius and cloudy weather. I have just seen the sun for a couple of hours this week.

As you know I been home sick this week. All week, so I have missed the first two lectures of my new course, but I have maxing friends that have sent me their notes. And this week last two classes were cancelled because the professor got sick. And that’s fine by me because that means I hopefully am not sick when they are rescheduled. 

If you read my post from Monday night, you know my husband had to go to the Emergency Room, but the doctors think it was just his cold and fever that was the problem. He is still not okay. And I am actually still worried about him. He hates going to the doctor, but I feel like I might have to convince him to go next week if he doesn’t get better. 

Oracle and Zelda on a walk this week

I got some amazing news on Tuesday afternoon, but I will share that with you in another post later on. Right now I just want to keep it secret for a little while longer. But it’s about the same thing that I wrote a post about for a couple of weeks ago. You can read it here.

And as you might have read on Wednesday, my husband and I had been together for 12 years that day. We did not calibrate because we both were sick so we will do that another day.

My husband and I in autumn 2007.

Friday I went to my grandmother’s house to start going through the things that we are dividing between my father, my uncle, my brother and me. My grandmother passed away in August, and my father and uncle have been going through her house for about two months now dividing things between them and now they thought it was my brother and my time to see if we wanted anything after her and my grandfather. It was really hard being there and going through her things. I miss her so much. But I am thankful for all the memories and that I get to keep some things as a memory after her. I am going back today to look at some more things and see my uncle.

And this afternoon my husband and I are eating dinner with my mother, my father, my brother, my sister-in-law and my nephew at my parent’s apartment. 

I also got the news on Friday, that I passed my Statistic Exam. I am so happy. Now I can focus fully on my Law course and place the statistic books in my bookshelf. And hopefully, I will never study Statistics again. 

This weeks posts are:

I hope everyone have an fantastic Sunday.

Love, Nea

Walks ~ Self-Care Saturday

It’s a cloudy Saturday here in Sweden and I am still not over my cold, but it’s time for this week’s Self-Care post. 

There are so many ways to take care of yourself. And I have already cared some with you. One thing I like to do is take walks, short or long. You get out in the fresh air and you can think. Also, you get exercise which is important and good for you.

I usually walk with my dogs. And my husband is with me at least one walk a day. For me is the walking a way to relax. Not see the things that I need to do at home, or with my studying. Just to walk and think about whatever comes to my mind. Yesterday when my husband and I took the last walk of the days with the dogs, I thought about the moon. And that was relaxing for me. 

Oracle and Zelda on a walk.

Walking also gives me perspective over things. For example, when I got stuck on an assignment for school I can take a walk and relax, and I usually get a new idea when I am out in the fresh air. 

Do you take a walk every day? Have an amazing Saturday and if you can try taking a walk today. Alone or in the company with dogs, friends and/or family.

Love, Nea

Racer-Zelda and the little tree



I was out on the morning walk with the dogs. It´s cloudy outside and the ground is wet from the rain that came yesterday. The dogs are understimulated because my husband and I aren’t completely well yet. And they start chasing each other and playing. They still have their leases on. And you know in movies how dogs run around a person so they can’t move. They did that to me, so I almost fell, but I am getting used to it so I was trying to get loose from Oracles lease when Zelda thought it was a good idea to run around a little tree…  And can you guess what happens next? 



The tree is quite flexible and Zelda try to get free, so the tree bends when she tries running to me so I get the tree like a whip in the side of my head. It hurt. But Zelda didn’t understand why I got angry at her. She was just really proud that she got lose from the tree herself.


Now we are inside in the warmth again and the dogs seem to be pleased with their morning walk.



Later today I will post my Fangirl Friday post. Hope you read it!                    Have a wonderful Friday!



Love, Nea


Zelda ~ Thankful Tuesday

For this weeks Thankful Tuesday post, I wanted to write about my dog Zelda. She is the little one in our small family.

She’s a Welsh Corgi Cardigan that is about 2,5 years old. And she is kind of goofy. She has a strong will and she loves to play. There is so much puppy left in her that she on a daily basic chase her tail.

We bought her so Oracle could get a little sister and someone to play with. And I am really thankful that we did. She always makes me laugh. And now we have two dogs to cuddle with.

When I have a cold, I have two dogs to warm me up. And they keep a close eye on me. Zelda loves to explore new places, but she is a homebody. She loves her yellow ring.

I could write so much more about her and I will but not today. Instead, I am going to share this picture of Zelda with you:

20181013_152549Zeldavattenmärke

Sick dog..

I haven’t been that active here these last couple of days, because I have a sick dog at home.

On Saturday Oracle started having some problems with her stomach and since then she has been sick. My husband and I have been taking turns going out with her, both day and night. And yesterday Oracle was with my husband at work so I could go to campus for a lecture. Zelda was alone at doggie daycare, but it went really well and she was so good.

Today I am staying home with both dogs. I don’t want to leave them home alone and yesterday is the first day Oracle actually ate something. Right now she is laying beside me on the sofa sleeping. She seeks closeness all the time and I am just trying to be here for her.

This morning my husband took her out for a quick walk while I gave Zelda her breakfast. Oracle is eating food that is gentle for her tummy so she can’t eat her usually dog food. When Oracle came inside she walked around for a bit and then she tried to poop, so I got up to get her out again, but she sat down on the rug in the living room and pulled her self forward with her butt pressed against the rug. She left a brown mark after her. I was not pleased, but not angry at her. She is sick. So I called my husband who had just left and he came back and cleaned up the rug while I walked both dogs outside.

It feels like Oracle is getting better, but I still want to keep an eye on her and that’s why I am staying home today. I don’t want to leave her with anyone else.

Now I am going to try to get some studying done before I need to take the dogs outside again.

Have an amazing day!

Love, Nea

Wonderful Weekend

This Friday was a busy day. I had an early lecture. Then I drove a friend to the train station. After that, I went to IKEA and bought some things for the bed. Then I went to my parent’s apartment and picked up my father. We went shopping and I drove him home. And all this before noon. Friday was like I said busy because the day wasn’t over there.

On Saturday I woke up early to walk the dogs, eat breakfast and then study before my niece christening. It was a beautiful day and I had a really nice time meeting everyone and taking many pictures. I love photographing and I am looking forward to getting some of the pictures in print. I think a few will make excellent Christmas presents.

Today I slept for a long time and woke up feeling relaxed and not tired. I love the mornings when I don’t need to set an alarm. It’s not often I can do this so I really enjoy the days that are like this.

Today I have been reading a few chapters in my course literature so I am up to speed on the coming lectures. I have also been doing some planning for the following days so I know what I need to do and when. I like having a plan for what’s to come. Even if it doesn’t go exactly as planned. If you are wondering what I am planning: What we are going to eat, How much I need to study this week and when, when the dogs are going to be at doggie daycare and what I want to write about in my posts.

Now I am going to relax with the dogs for a while and read a book. Then I just might study some more.

Have a fantastic evening!

Love, Nea