Tag: About me

Early morning on Campus

On By NeaIn Anxiety, Depression, Everyday life, Life, Mental Health, Panic attacks, Studying, UniversityLeave a comment

This morning I woke up at 4 am. And 15 minutes later my alarm went off. It was just to go up and eat breakfast. The reason that I got up so early is that my husband and I drove in together this morning. He starts his job at 7 am in the morning, but it takes an hour to get to campus and we had to drop the dogs at doggie daycare before 7 am.

Now I am sitting at campus listening to a music and trying to motivate myself to study. And wishing that I drank coffee so that I could wake up. But I don’t drink anything with caffeine.

I have been thinking these last days about that I feel like this world is getting more and more hard. We are harder against each other. There is more bullying around us. In school and online. And people are less understanding with other people and their feelings. People are more selfish. I wish that we could spread love and not hate.

I have been told by many people over the last couple of years that my “sickness” is something that makes me the wrong human being to study. That I should stay home. These are things I have never taken to heart.

I know that every one that is fighting against their mental health can overcome it. I have found that taking action is the only thing that helps me with my panic attacks. With this I mean. Do things that you know can and will sett you of. But do it small steps at a time. If you get panic attacks when you shop for groceries. Then go early in the morning or later in the evening, when there are much fewer people in the store. And have as a goal to maybe just by one or two products. And you can, of course, have someone with you as support.

And do this until you are ready to increase the number of products you by. And someday you can shop for an entire week at once.

That is my best advice. Take it slow. But do something to get yourself better. I am not saying that I don´t get panic attacks in the store. Because I do. All the time. But I can handle them better now. And I know that if I am having a rough week then I don’t shop when the stores are the busiest. You have to pick your battles. And right now I am concentrating on finishing my education. And almost all my energy is going to go to all my classes even if I am having a hard day.

This became a longer post than planned. Sorry for the rant.

Have an inspiring day!

Love, Nea

Campus this morning

October is officially here

On By NeaIn Anxiety, Depression, Everyday life, Life, Mental Health, Panic attacks, Studying, UniversityLeave a comment

October. The Month when it really feels like autumn is here. And all I want to do is sit on the couch with a blanket, a good book and a cup of hot chocolate. And some candles burning on the coffee table.

But what I need to do is: Study for my exam that is on the 29 of October. And I also need to do laundry, especially wash my mittens and scarfs. And many more things need to be done. It feels like there are more things than time. I am going through a rough patch right now, as some of you may have understood from my previous posts. And I am stressing out about all the things around me.

Yesterday I had a “normal” day at campus, but when I got home I was exhausted. I slept for about an hour on the sofa with the dogs before I had any energy to get something done.

Today I had an earlier day on campus and after that, I went to a shopping mall and got a christening present for my niece (my husband’s older brothers daughter) that is getting christen on Saturday. Something that had totally fallen out of my mind. And I realised this weekend that we had not gotten her a gift yet.

But on the plus side when I started looking for something to by for her I found the perfect Christmas gift for my nephew (my brother’s son) and also a birthday present for him. His birthday is in February.

Then it hit me. It’s just a couple of months to Christmas. I don’t know where the time has gone. It feels like September just went by without me noticing. Is it me or does time go faster when you get older than it did when you were a child?

Now I am going to study. And then it’s out in the pouring rain to walk the dogs.

Have a lovely evening!

Love, Nea

This mornings walk with the dogs! 😍

I survived hump day

On By NeaIn About me, Mental Health, Studying, UniversityLeave a comment

And I am really proud of myself. It was a long day yesterday. But I did it.

Today has been a much better day. I was home alone for a few hours when my husband went to work this morning and on the way dropped of the dogs at daycare.

After lunch I drove to campus and had a really good meting with my student consuler. We talked about the next couple of years and my options. And I am really happy about what was said. I will share more with you in an later post.

After that I had some time to befor my computerlabiration started and while I was waiting a friend of my found me and we got a chance to catch up.

Now I am at home and all I want to do is eat and relax. So thats what I am going to do.

Good nigth, Nea

Happy Hump Day!

On By NeaIn Everyday life, Life, UniversityLeave a comment

Happy Hump Day!

I am writing this on campus. I am waiting for my next “lecture” to start. In about 2 hours. My first lecture was at 11:15 and now I am trying to study, but there is quite a lot of noise around me. Because this week is the first week of the term the campus is pumping with life and people, all the time. Almost every parking spot is occupied and so are the bike racks.

I am looking forward to this day to end. It is really a hump day for me. The longest school day for this week and I finish at six a clock this evening. And I need to go grocery shopping and pick up my dogs before I am home again. From campus till my house I have about 1 h driving to do. So I am happy if I am home to about 8 a clock this evening.

But this is the life of a student or a worker. I shouldn’t complain. I have a wonderful life and an amazing opportunity to study at university. And I know that when I pick up my dogs they will be happy to see me and they are going to want to snuggle.

My husband is probably working late this evening. But when he gets home we will cook some food and talk about our day. It’s nice to just relax together.

Now the big question is: What are we going to eat tonight? It’s hard to think of something easy. But I will figure it out.

Now I shall try to study some. Have an amazing Hump day!

Love, Nea

Autumn is here to stay!

Sunday morning

On By NeaIn About me, Anxiety, Depression, Everyday life, Life, Mental Health, Panic attacks, UniversityLeave a comment

Hello,

Today is the day before my first class of the term. I feel ready, but I am a bit anxious about starting again. As I have previously told I have a problem with a lot of people and I know that every class starts tomorrow so there will be a lot of people on campus tomorrow.  I am afraid of having a panic attack, even though I know that if I do I will be alright. I have my trick for coping. Trying to think of things that make me happy. Looking at pictures. And if I don’t feel safe where I am, I try to get somewhere I feel safer. And if none of these things helps I usually call someone to talk to a bit. Tell them about my problems and we talk til I feel better. More relaxed.

I don’t take any pills for my mental health. Doctors have said that they can write me prescriptions, but I want to overcome this on my own. I don’t look down on people that take pills, I understand them. I am not saying I am stronger or better. I just say that everyone must do their own choices. And maybe one day I will need to take the pills, but not now.

And I can tell you I am on medication for my asthma and my allergies. Just not anything for my depression, anxiety or panic attacks.

If there is anything you want to know. Please ask.

Love, Nea

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Picture from this mornings walk.

15 Movies I want to see from this year

On By NeaIn Fangirl, moviesLeave a comment

There are a lot of movies I want to see. I love movies. Here is 10 of them that I want to see that came or is coming out this year;

  1. Christopher Robin (2018) by Disney. Trailer

I love Disney movies and I love Winnie the Pooh (Nalle Puh in Sweden). So this movie is of course on the list.

2. Deadpool 2 (2018) Trailer

Because I loved the first Deadpool movie. I went to see it with my husband (then fiance), my brother and his girlfriend. I am really looking forward to seeing this movie.

3. Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald (2018) Trailer

I am a huge Harry Potter fangirl. And I love the universe they take place in. I loved all the Harry Potter movies and the books. I was a little afraid that I wouldn’t like; Fantastic Beasts and where to find them when a watched it but I loved it. Now I am really looking forward to seeing the next part. I want Newt and Tina together.

4. Robin Hood (2018) Trailer

I want to watch Robin Hood because I love the stories of Robin Hood. And I feel like the cast in this movie can make it funny and interesting. I think I have seen almost every version of Robin Hood and so far my favourite is the Robin Hood with Kevin Costner.

5. Jurassic World 2: Fallen Kingdom (2018) Trailer

When I was 3 years old the first Jurassic Park movie was released. I was too little to watch it, but when I saw it I was hooked. Therefore this movie is a must see for me.

6. Ocean’s 8 (2018) Trailer

I Love Sandra Bullock. And I love that Hollywood is casting all females in older movies that hade male leads. Like Ghost Busters. Do I have to explain more?

7. Mamma Mia 2: Here we go again (2018) Trailer

The first Mamma Mia movie is one of my favourite movies. I love the music. ABBA is from Sweden and I have grown up with the music. And now there is a second movie.

8. Dog Days (2018) Trailer

A movie with Dog in the title and Dogs in the movie. Do I really need to say more?

9. Alex and the list (2018) Trailer

This is a movie that a friend talked about. I watched the trailer and saw that Karen Gillian and Jennifer Morrison is in it. And now I want to see it. The trailer was funny too.

10. Blockers (2018) Trailer

The trailer seemed hilarious so now I want to see it.

11. Tag (2018) Trailer

A movie with Isla Fisher, Jeremy Renner and Jake Johnson is a must on this list. I looked at the trailer and it seems to be a hilarious movie.

12. The Grinch (2018) Trailer
I love How the Grinch Stole Christmas (2000) with Jim Carrey. It is one of my favourite Christmas movies. Therefore I can’t miss this movie.

13. The Spy Who Dumped Me (2018) Trailer

I think this movie will be fantastic. I love Mila Kunis. She is so funny. And Kate McKinnon I saw for the first time in Ghostbusters III and I loved her. These two together in an action movie sounds like it could be funny.

14. Peppermint (2018) Trailer

I love Jennifer Garner. She is badass in Alias and she is sweet and funny in 13 going on 30. And it thinks she will be amazing in this movie.

15. Mary Poppins Returns (2018) Trailer

I loved the original Mary Poppins movie with Julie Andrews. It’s a movie I still look at sometimes when I feel sad. It makes me happy. So, of course, I want to see when Mary Poppins Returns. And I think Emily Blunt is a good fit for the role.

What movies do you want to see this year?

Quiet day at home!

On By NeaIn Everyday life, Life, Oracle, University, ZeldaLeave a comment

Hello world,

today I am taking a quiet day at home. I’m feeling a bit sick. I think I have a cold coming on, so I am taking it slow today. Even tho it feels like I have a million things to do. It can be really nice to just slow down for a bit. I am doing some laundry and I have looked at things for next weeks semester start. My schedule is more packed than I would have wanted it to be. But that is life. You just have to make the best of it.

This morning a went on a walk with my two dogs, Oracle and Zelda. You could feel the rain hanging in the air, but it was still nice. It really starting to feel like autumn is here to stay. I will miss the summer, but I love all the different seasons because they all bring something I love.

Like Autumn with the crisp air and the leaves falling down, that the dogs love to play in. The colours are so beautiful and amazing to photograph. And taking long walks with the dogs and my husband is cozy. And then coming inside and crawling down under a blanket on the couch and just holding on to each other. Maybe just talking, watching something on Netflix or just reading.

Right now I am sitting on the couch with the dogs. Zelda is snoring beside me and Oracle is half asleep. They love being close to me and I love it. Dogs are really good companions to have. I can’t imagine my life without them.

Now I have to take care of the clothes in the washing machine. Have a nice day.

Love, Nea

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Zelda in my lap yesterday. She wanted to be with my when I was writing.

My first post!

On By NeaIn About me, Life, Mental Health, OracleLeave a comment

This is my first post. I have been thinking about what I wanted to share with you.. I was thinking about just telling you lite about my self and why I want with this blog.

I have started this blog because I want to share my life with you all. It’s going to be kind of a diary, not really that secret. And I will write about all the things I find interesting and things that happen in my life.

My name is Linnéa, but almost everyone calls me Nea. I am 28 years old. I am currently a student at Örebro University. I am also a wife since July 2018 to A. We have been together for almost 12 years. And we live in a small town in the middle of Sweden. The population is a little bit over 7000.

For about 10 years have I been living with panic disorder, anxiety and depression. It was so bad at one point that I couldn’t leave my apartment. But I took control over my life with the help of my amazing husband, family and friends.  We moved to a house and got a dog, Oracle (I will tell you more about her later) and I trained her to be my therapy dog. Without this, I don’t know where I would be right now. I am forever thankful for every amazing person in my life and for my dog, Oracle.

I hope you like my blog. I am really new to this, so please be kind to me.

Love, Nea