Well, I am not moody, but my dogs are. They are coming in to heat soon and they are being really bitchy. And when they’re not bitching at each other they are sleeping. Or in Zelda’s case howling at the dogs that pass on our street.
I am studying from home today, which I find really nice. I am also planning the coming posts here on the blog. If you have any requests please let me know.
My husband got home early from work because he got sick. I hope he gets better soon.
”Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Be kind. Always.” ~ Ian Maclaren
This Motivational Monday quote is a reminder that we can’t see what everyone is fighting against. Some people can be fighting depression or maybe fibromyalgia. We don’t know. But we can be kind to each other.
I am so tired of people not being kind to each other. It doesn’t take some much more energy to try and be nice. Give each other compliments. Build up one and another, instead of tearing down.
Be a good example for the children, for a better future. The world needs more love, not more hate.
So I decided to try a new kind of Situation Sunday because I feel like my old ones weren’t really what I wanted to share with you. I will probably write some news from around the world on Situation Sunday, but it will mostly be about my week and my thoughts in the future. If you don’t have any requests.
This week have been eventful. And I will share bits of it with you.
On Monday I had my Statistics Exam from 8 in the morning to 1 in the afternoon. I feel like I have a very slim chance of getting a passing grade on that exam, so I will probably have to take it again in December. And for that, I am really sad, but I did my best and my head wasn’t really in the game so to say.
On Monday afternoon my husband underwent surgery. It’s a surgery we have waited for a couple of months and it was nice that it was finally happening. But the surgery was postponed from 1 o’clock in the afternoon to 2 in the afternoon. When I talked to him after my test he said that they also had some delays. I went to his work to eat some lunch and wait for the operation to finish because I was driving him home. His operation started at 3 o’clock in the end. But now its done. And it went well and he is now recovering.
It’s been snowing some here at the beginning of the week and in Sweden, you need to have winter tires on your car between 1 of December to the 31 of Mars. But you need to have winter tires on before that if there are ice and snow on the roads before that. And my husband’s car is a company car that didn’t have winter tires so on Monday I had my parents car and also on Tuesday. On Wednesday my husband got new winter tires on his car but now it’s not cold out anymore. I am hoping for the cold to get back soon. I want to have winter in November and December.
My husband needs to take it easy after his surgery and should not lift things or take it easy. So this week I have tried to make life as easy for him as possible and made sure that he doesn’t lift things. And that has been hard to do because he does not like sitting still. He likes being active.
Last Sunday we place a bid on a kitchen table and 6 chairs from an auction that my mother-in-law’s boyfriend runs. We only saw pictures of it but it looked really nice and my mother-in-law went to the action and saw it so we trusted her judgment. And I am so glad that we did. Because we won so now we have a new kitchen table and chairs. The set is so much better than any set we have watched on furniture stores. Flash forward to this Wednesday when we got the delivery of the furniture. My brother came to help us with the lifting, but we couldn’t get somebody else, so my husband decides that he will carry the table with my brother, even tho he should not do that. At the end after a lot of bickering between my husband and me, and then between my husband and my mother-in-law, she came and helped my brother and me in with the table and chairs. And I am so grateful for her and my brothers help.
Our new table and 4 of the 6 chairs.
And yesterday I spent the whole day in bed because I was not feeling well. And I am really sad because we were going to meet my mother-in-law’s boyfriends daughter and her family. Something I had been looking forward to, but I will just have to meet them another day.
Now that some parts from my eventful week. I didn’t write anything about my mental health struggles this week, that is not because I didn’t have any but because I feel like I don’t need to share it with you today. I more or less always fighting with my anxiety and my panic attacks, but I don’t want it to be my entire life. I will write about it in other posts in the future just not today. Today is a good day.
I hope you don’t mind me changing Situation Sunday. And that you have an amazing week to come!
I didn’t post anything yesterday, because I was not feeling well. So I am thinking about posting two Self-care Sunday posts next week. But we will just have to wait and see.
Today I have a full day ahead of me at home with cleaning and washing. I have already started two washing machines and folded dry clothes. I am also trying to work on my individual assignment that is due at the end of next week.
Now I am going to take care of the dishes in the kitchen. I will be back later with a Situation Sunday post, it will be a little different from before.
I am starting to get really nervous about my exam next Monday. I am studying and trying my best to be ready. But it feels like I am failing. But I won’t give up. I am going to do my best and that just needs to be enough.
Yesterday I had a bad day at campus. I had to park far from my lecture hall and when I started walking to my lecture, a little stressed, I meet a couple of people that were vaping and smoking cigarettes. I tried to hold my breath and keep away from them, but I couldn’t so I got an Asthma attack. I took some medicine and thought that I still could make it to my class. So I kept moving, but slower this time. Then when I came to the building I was going to have my lecture, I went into the toilet. But someone had been smoking in there. So after my second Asthma attack for the day, I was not feeling so good. I meet a friend and tried to not get a panic attack as well. But I just couldn’t stay on campus and go on the lecture. I was feeling weak and my chest hurt. I called my husband that picked me up.
Now I am at home, still not feeling great. And missing today’s two classes. I feel awful. But I am going to study from home today. To get ready for the exam. And I am going to get some rest, so I don’t get worse.
I hope you have a fantastic day. And this Weeks WCW post is soon out. Read it.
I don’t really know what happened. I have had an okay day, but now in the afternoon, I started feeling down. I am feeling like I want to crawl down in a hole and not come out. This is a feeling I hate to have and I am trying to turn this day around.
I am feeling drained by the lack of sleep and the worries about Oracle. By what I have observed today I want to say that she is feeling better, but I am not sure. I have spent the last two days at home, but today I want into campus to have a computer lab about statistics. My father had the dogs while I was away and I am really thankful for that.
Tomorrow I have an early lecture and then I really need to continue with my studying for the exam. I am a little nervous about the exam, but I am going to do my best and that just have to be enough.
Right now I am fighting to keep my eyes open, but I have so much more to do today. The dogs need to get food and then a walk. My husband is cooking dinner for us, so I need to eat. And I really should pack my bag for tomorrow. And put the dog cages in the car, so I don’t need to stress about that tomorrow morning. Plus I have a few emails I need to send away.
I haven’t been that active here these last couple of days, because I have a sick dog at home.
On Saturday Oracle started having some problems with her stomach and since then she has been sick. My husband and I have been taking turns going out with her, both day and night. And yesterday Oracle was with my husband at work so I could go to campus for a lecture. Zelda was alone at doggie daycare, but it went really well and she was so good.
Today I am staying home with both dogs. I don’t want to leave them home alone and yesterday is the first day Oracle actually ate something. Right now she is laying beside me on the sofa sleeping. She seeks closeness all the time and I am just trying to be here for her.
This morning my husband took her out for a quick walk while I gave Zelda her breakfast. Oracle is eating food that is gentle for her tummy so she can’t eat her usually dog food. When Oracle came inside she walked around for a bit and then she tried to poop, so I got up to get her out again, but she sat down on the rug in the living room and pulled her self forward with her butt pressed against the rug. She left a brown mark after her. I was not pleased, but not angry at her. She is sick. So I called my husband who had just left and he came back and cleaned up the rug while I walked both dogs outside.
It feels like Oracle is getting better, but I still want to keep an eye on her and that’s why I am staying home today. I don’t want to leave her with anyone else.
Now I am going to try to get some studying done before I need to take the dogs outside again.
For this week’s Throwback Thursday I want to share this picture with you:
This is my dog Oracle when she was 8 weeks old and her mother. This was the day we brought her home with us. It was one of the happiest days of my life. I finally had my own dog after wanting one for so many years.
This was taken in March 2013 and I can’t believe that Oracle is going to be 6 years in January next year. She is one of the best parts of my life and I owe so much to her.
I don’t actually remember if I have written anything about this before, but I have trained Oracle to be my therapy dog. And she has been there for me whenever I need her and I love her so much. She doesn’t have to work as much now as she did a couple of years ago but she still helps me when I need her to.
I am definitely going to write more about my dogs because they are a big part of my life.
Yesterday I got a good estimate of how easily I get scared when I am home alone.
I was sitting in the living room studying and its really windy outside and its raining, and kind of dark outside. Then the lights flicker, which didn’t get me scared. But all the sudden the ventilation increases and I don’t understand why and I find it really scary. I call my husband and asks him if he has come home and decided to play a trick on me, and he says that he is at work. And I am like.. What do I do? He tells me that the flickering in light is the electricity had a spike in it and that I need to go down and turn down the ventilation. I am still scared at this point and I am thinking that someone got into the house, through our garage and into the boiler room and started messing with the ventilation so I would walk down and they could kill me… Stupid, right? So my husband has to talk to me on the phone while I walk down there. And the house is squeaking because its an older house and it’s really windy outside. I am seriously thinking about locking myself in the bedroom. But I did it.
And afterwards, I felt really stupid for getting so scared. My fantasy is just too good sometimes. And I am use to old houses and I usually like being home alone.
Today I have already had my lecture and now I am at home with the dogs. And I should be studying, but I feel like all my energy just vanished. And all I want is to cuddle with the dogs and my husband. But he is not going to be home for a couple of hours. He is working hard and here I am complaining about not having the energy to study… So for my own sake and for all his hard work I am going to study.
I am thankful for being married to the best man I have ever meet. He is my best friend and I know that he is always there for me.
I can call him whenever I need to talk to him and he always gives me time. When I have a panic attack he just gives me exactly what I need. He listens to my problems and he is always a good sounding board to my ideas and thoughts.
He makes me laugh, even if I had a really bad day. You know the kind of laughter that makes your stomach ache.
He supports my dreams and goals. Many of them are the same for both of us. And he always pushes me to do better and to never give up. He helps me overcome things I didn’t think I would ever be able to do. But with his help, I am now studying at a University and getting a bachelor’s degree in Business Administration (Company Economics in Swedish).
This November we have been a couple for 12 years and I don’t know what I would do without him in my life.
I could write a book about what he means to me and still not be close to finishing with all that is amazing about this man.
So to finish this post. I am thankful for my husband on this thankful Tuesday.
The Not So Secret Diary of Nea 